Jokes
Two buddies are hunting in the woods when one says to the other, "Hey, I can see your house from here and,wait! Your wife is in her room with some other guy".
Three men, a philosopher, a mathematician and a smart-ass, were out riding in the car when it crashed into a tree. Before anyone knows it, the three men found themselves standing before the pearly gates of Heaven, where St. Peter and the Devil were standing nearby. [more…]
A woman was walking down the street when she was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked her for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The woman took out her bill fold, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some wine with it instead of dinner?" [more…]
A ventriloquist cowboy walks into town and sees an Indian sitting near his pad.
Cowboy: Hey, cool dog. Mind if I speak to him?
Indian: Dog no talk.
Cowboy: Hey dog, how’s it going?
Dog: Doin’ all right. [more…]
Husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up.
But then the wife stops and says, "I don’ t feel like it. I just want you to hold me".
[more…]
There were two blondes, and they had just came from a store.
The blonde that owned the Mustang had locked her keys in the car. [more…]
A man runs into the vet’s office carrying his dog, screaming for help.
The vet rushes him back to an examination room and puts his dog down on
the examination table.
There's nothing worse than a Doctor's Receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it. [more…]
A manager at Wal-Mart had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job. [more…]
A guy goes into a church confessional booth and says:
"Forgive me Father for I have sinned. Last night I slept with 3 different." [more…]
